Insight into the contemporary Indian wedding: A Reflection

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Wedding events has always been considered to be one of the most auspicious occasions in one’s life.  Such events are not only important for the couple going to tie a nuptial knot but also for the family, friends and relatives surrounding the brides and grooms. During these recent decade marriage events has experienced sea changes in how the event process has professionalized itself. The upcoming of event consultant and professionals has made it possible in bringing such change that has transformed the whole events to be more joyous and filled with fun.

I still remember that as a child I was exposed to both rural and urban marriages and the close distinction in the marriages that occurred in the diverse cultural group. It was during such exposure that I experienced the nostalgic folk songs of the rural India sung mostly by the elder women accompanied by the younger newlywed women. These songs still gives a fragrance memory of the traditional way the marriage process occurred. Now it’s been replaced by DJs or private party musicians and singer. Friends and relatives used to gather a month before the actual marriage. I observed elders planning and managing the whole events that has to be meticulously performed as it relates to their pride and giving utmost respect to the guest invited for such auspicious occasion.

Engagement ceremonies of today are performed with rings being exchanged between bride and groom irrespective of religion. But earlier this had the rituals performed by the priest. Engagement ceremony is being followed by Subh Tilak amongst the Hindus that are usually performed at the groom’s place of residence and in some cases community hall are booked.

Subh Tilak is actually a gift giving ceremony, in which the tradition of gifts, clothes, utensils and dowry (still evident) are being ushered to the groom and his family. Earlier the duration between the Subh Tilak and the actual marriage day used to be a more than a week or two. But with the changing times it’s been shortened to three to four days for the purpose of less known ceremony of Madwa and Mehndi rasam (ceremony).In the recent years due to the cultural acceptance and mingling in India, Baarat (when actual day of marriage), the modus operandi of Baarat events are almost same in all religions. Event management companies expertise and cultural knowledge in arranging these marriages tailor-made (due to the large cultural diversity), mixed with the cocktail of western touch has really helped the marriage events becoming memorable. Take for instance the marriage events of Liz Hurley and Arun Nair, the ceremony being performed in Jodhpur, India had drawn the global media attention that resulted in the beeline of celebrity marriage from US, UK in India.

Baarat events are considered to be the most important event of all the marriage events as on this day of events the actual marriage is to take place. Band parties are booked by the groom’s family three to four months before the actual day of marriage due to their busy schedule and to make it low cost affairs. During the last hour it is not necessary that one can engage reputed band party. Band party includes musician and the light man that makes the event colorful. Series of car and Bus accompany these Bandwala that accommodate family, friends and relatives of groom. Grooms car follows the rest of the car that are especially decorated with variety of beautiful flowers so that the people surrounding could establish the groom car. Baarat actually means the group of people of Groom acquaintances moves together towards the Brides place (community place could also be booked for the purpose).Family, friends and especially young lads of grooms acquaintances dance and fire cracker before the grooms convoy. Finally, after the Baarat reaches its destination, they are being welcomed by Bride relatives and their family member. This is followed by Jaymala ceremony.

Jaimala ceremony is a simple ceremony in which brides and groom garland each other that demonstrates that both of them accepts each other as to be a wife and husband that would eventually happens in few hours. It’s a symbolic ceremony that gives the opportunity to the bride family and her acquaintances’ to have the first glimpse of Grooms look in his new specially designed attire. Similar is the story from Grooms side to break the suspense of how beautiful the bride is. Nowadays usually Sherwani are being preferred by the Grooms especially designed for the marriage purpose. Brides wear saari for this special occasion, the trend is to wear Banarasi silk sari with silver linings and in the exceptional affluent case golden lining sari are preferred by the bride for wearing on this particular day.After the Jaymala ceremony is over all the guests are being invited for dinner party. The dinner menus are carefully prepared taking in view the cultural food habits and getting informed about their specific requirements. Finally, the marriage ceremony takes place being facilitated by the priest. Marriage ceremony is then followed by Reception party being thrown by the Grooms family.

Reception party is attended by the guest invited, that presents gift to the brides and grooms and bless them for their future prosperity. Nowadays DJs and private music band party has an eminent role in making such events memorable. Dinner party is thrown on this very day and Non-Vegetable items are included on the dinner menu. There is also a trend of serving alcohol in such reception party.      
During the old days, the whole marriage events used to extend for a year and in some exceptional cases two or more years. It’s surprising, but till the recent times the practice has to undergo several phases of marriage rituals that includes ceremonies even after the actual marriage has occurred. All these were evident only in the arrange marriage as love marriage were a strict no-no during those times. Now with the advent of increasing educated population, social awareness and strict law enforcement, perception towards love marriage has changed. A love marriage nowadays translates into the arranged marriages so as to get social acceptance.